Enculturation of gender norms
The enculturation of gender norms regarding parental roles happens without us realising it. This article shows how gender norms are especially influential when it comes to parenting roles. If you visit FT online and sign up your students and yourself for free access to FT articles, you will find plenty of topics on the psychology of human development and human relationships, which are both relevant to this blog.
Introducing gender norms
Years ago, I would introduce this topic in my psychology class by asking students to raise their hands if they agreed with the statement, “Mothers should not work outside the home when their children are of preschool age.” Typically, about half the class would raise their hands. In the same tone, I would then ask who agreed with the statement, “Fathers should not work outside the home when their children are of preschool age.” This question usually prompted giggles and hesitation, followed by a series of explanations for why mothers should stay home while fathers should work.
The exercise provided a powerful illustration of the enculturation of gender norms. The roles that are presented to us as “normal” often come to seem naturally correct, even though they are shaped by cultural expectations rather than biological necessity.
Kate Bassett’s FT online article shows how deeply this enculturation goes. She reports that when women are the primary earners in a family, contributing 60% or more of the household income, divorce rates tend to be higher. The article explores several possible explanations for this pattern. Although the statistics cited come from Sweden and the United States, they suggest that in heterosexual marriages, at least in Western societies, a wife earning significantly more than her husband may create stress for both partners, reflecting the persistence of traditional gender expectations. Follow the link to read the article, and then go to the FT school psychology class article to answer the questions. The questions and answers for teachers can be found below.
Questions
- The author quotes one mother as saying, “The informal social infrastructure around parenting – school-gate conversations, WhatsApp groups, daytime networks – is still overwhelmingly organised around mothers.” How might this affect a father who is taking the responsibility for day-to-day parenting?
It could make them feel isolated and without a social network to support them when they want advice or simply wish to spend time with other parents who are at home during the day. They could become lonely and feel that they are being treated as outsiders. They would need confidence to engage with mothers at the school gate or to join groups of mothers making informal visits to parks or playgrounds.
2. The Pew Research Center statistics quoted in this article suggest two changes in women’s role as an earner in the marriage. What are they?
- The percentage of women in opposite-sex (heterosexual) marriages in the United States who were the primary or sole wage earners increased from 5% in 1972 to 16% in 2022.
- Of these women, 6% were the sole wage earners, meaning that their husbands had no earnings.
3. Why do you think that, according to the FT article and the Pew Research Center report linked above, women still spend more time on childcare and housework than men, even when husbands and wives work the same number of hours in paid employment?
Students may give several reasons:
- Women are enculturated into the expectation that being a wife and mother means being responsible for childcare, cooking, and cleaning, whether or not they also have a job outside the home. As a result, they may find it difficult to let go of these roles without feeling guilty.
- Men are also enculturated into these expectations. They may find it difficult to take on childcare and housework because these tasks are often perceived as low-status and inconsistent with traditional ideas of masculinity.
- As noted in the response to the first question, men may also lack the informal social networks that would support and validate them in this role.
4. Folke and Rickne (2016) found that women who were promoted to top political or business positions experienced higher divorce rates, whereas comparable promotions for men did not lead to an increase in divorce. This finding suggests that marital tensions are not caused solely by women’s earnings. Find a statement in the FT article that supports this idea. According to the article, what other factors contribute to tension in marriages?
There are several statements that identify the wife’s career status as a source of marital tension:
“Research suggests that when women out-earn their male partners, it can unsettle some long-held assumptions about status and identity within relationships.”
“Marital tension in opposite-sex couples where the primary earner is female may even include ‘embarrassment or resentment linked to a partner’s career trajectory, and a sense that one’s own hard-earned status is diminished in comparison.’”
“What matters [in those cases] isn’t just income, but occupational prestige.”
5. “Radical transparency” is presented as a solution to changes in household economics. How does this idea relate to the role of communication in interpersonal relationships?
According to Maria MacDonald, director of strategic accounts at the UK tech company Hypervsn, radical transparency involves clear interpersonal communication about finances. This includes joint decision-making about spending and saving, viewing money as a shared resource, and openly discussing the pressures and emotions involved in managing family finances.
6. The article focuses mainly on status and income rather than childcare. What might radical transparency around childcare look like? Develop three or four basic rules that would promote open communication and shared responsibility, either when both parents are working or when only the wife is working.
Accept any reasonable suggestions. Students could present their ideas as a set of rules to display around the classroom for a gallery walk and discussion.
7. Bassett interviewed two women who are the primary earners in their families and argues that social expectations surrounding gender roles in heterosexual marriages lag behind economic reality. As more countries legally recognize same-sex marriages, do you think understandings of gender roles within marriage will become more flexible in response to these changing realities? Explain your answer.
Most students will probably argue that, because the traditional gender binary is not relevant to roles in same-sex marriages, the view of “women as carers and men as earners” will eventually break down and be replaced by a more diverse range of family roles.
Some students may point out that social expectations surrounding heterosexual marriages may remain separate from those surrounding same-sex marriages, in which case changes to traditional gender roles may occur more slowly.
References
Bassett, K. (6 March 2026). Couples navigate their new money dynamics, FT online. https://www.ft.com/content/bc69afa2-9294-46c4-bc30-f9535e15dbb9
Folke, O. and Rickne, J. (2016). All the Single Ladies: Job Promotions and the Durability of Marriage. IFN Working Paper, No. 1146, Research Institute of Industrial Economics (IFN), Stockholm. https://www.econstor.eu/bitstream/10419/183375/1/wp1146.pdf
Fry, R., Aragão, C., Hurst, K. and Parker, K. (13 April 2023). In a Growing Share of US Marriages, Husbands and Wives Earn About the Same, Pew Research Center. https://www.pewresearch.org/social-trends/2023/04/13/in-a-growing-share-of-u-s-marriages-husbands-and-wives-earn-about-the-same/
Pew Research Center (2 June 2025). Same-Sex Marriage Around the World. https://www.pewresearch.org/religion/fact-sheet/same-sex-marriage-around-the-world/